Update On Casey

My last few posts have been rants about different things that I care about. I don't want this blog to become to impersonal, so I will give an update about myself.

How am I doing? I am doing pretty weirdly. (Intentionally awesome non-word.) I've been taken off my long term nausea medication that was keeping me semi-functional for many years. I started showing minimal, permanent side effects from the long term use of that particular medication. The doctor immediately refused to refill my prescription of them.

I was off those pills for two full days and both of those days were misery. The only way I can explain it is you (the reader) taking the worst stomach flu you've ever had, and multiply it by about five. I have a massive, irrational fear of vomiting in the first place and not having my pills made it just terrible. I was in a living hell for those two days and I finally had to call the doctor back and tell him what was going on.

He then prescribed me a new medication. An anxiety medication. Due to all my previous medical testing coming back negative, he went to the next logical step and thinking that my health problems are psychological. So I began this wonderful journey with these new pills. And....wow.

My head has been so foggy, it's a strain to put a coherent sentence together when I'm talking with someone. I stumble over easy words, I completely forget conversations I had five minutes before. I walk into a room for something and can't remember why I went in. Friends have told me my personality has changed as well. I'm acting more awkward and unsure of myself.

However in the last few days, I have become more creatively motivated than I have ever been in my entire life. Ideas are coming to me all the time and it's hard to keep track of them. I had to open a notepad file on the computer to write things down because due to my memory problems, I will forget it and never get it back again.

On the nausea front, the pills are effective. I'm feeling pretty well. If I'm having the same or better results with this anxiety medication than I was with actual nausea medication, it pretty much proves that this shit is in my head. I don't know if what I am taking can be taken long term. If it can, I'm not sure I'm going to want to with how fuzzy it's made me. I do like the creativity however. As you can probably tell by the fact this will be my second blog posted in an hour at 3:27am.

Anyway, that's about all there is with me lately. Thanks for reading.